This Week’s WORDS are dedicated to Grandma, er, grammar... March 4 is National Grammar Day!
More Grammar
“Perfect grammar—persistent, continuous, sustained—
is the fourth dimension, so to speak;
many have sought it, but none has found it.”
is the fourth dimension, so to speak;
many have sought it, but none has found it.”
—Mark Twain (1835-1910), Autobiography, 1924
. . . and, another classic:
Piddlin’ Rules
“1. No sentence fragments.
2. It behooves us to avoid archaisms.
3. Also, avoid awkward or affected alliteration.
4. Don't use no double negatives.
5. If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times, “Resist hyperbole!”
6. Avoid com
mas, that are not necessary.7. Verbs has to agree with their subjects.
8. Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
9. Writing carefully, dangling participles should not be used.
10. Kill all exclamation points!!!
11. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.
12. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
13. Take the bull by the hand and don't mix metaphors.
14. Don’t verb nouns.
15. Never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
16. Last but not least, avoid clichés like the plague.”
—William Safire (1929-2009), Pulitzer Prize-winner, wordguy,
presidential speechifier and columnist.
presidential speechifier and columnist.
and on punctuation:
“He once telephoned a semicolon from Moscow.”
—James Agate (1877-1947), British diarist,
critic and master of the aphorism, 1935
(on being asked if a contemporary writer was a fastiduous journalist).
critic and master of the aphorism, 1935
(on being asked if a contemporary writer was a fastiduous journalist).
finally, what the heck . . .
“Bad spellers of the world, untie.”
—Graffiti, anon.
Editor’s Note: Untie? more like unravel.
Today’s Wish-I-Were-Here Photo: Trinidad Pier at Sunrise
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#13 brought this back: When I was a senior in high school, many years ago, I gave a brief talk at the dedication of our new three-pool facility in El Monte. The mayor of El Monte, one Rolly Miller, spoke just before I did. He was juggling two cliches: "pick up the ball and run with it" and "take the bull by the horns." You work it out. Needless to say, his was a tough act to follow.
ReplyDelete--Will